Dear Readers,

I guess I was wrong in thinking I had one reader. There are at least five of you. Hi Mary Jo! Hi Sarah! Hi Amy! Hi Blaire! Hi Lauren! Your words were very kind - thank you.

I am noticing what feeling different means. I have had some opportunities to practice lately. TJ and I took the boys to Asheville a couple weeks ago for a Mat Kearney concert, and it was a very different thing for me to do on a Wednesday afternoon and evening. I fear different actions because I am convinced I will have different feelings, and for some reason, I have believed different feelings will be bad feelings. However, with experience, I am learning this isn’t true. I had very good feelings during and after that concert. It was terrific, in fact. I felt happy. I was with TJ and the boys. I was listening to good music that I like. I had eaten a great meal at Buxton Hall before the concert. We met interesting people standing by us at the venue. We drank bottles of water, at a time when only a bottle of water will do the trick after salty BBQ. We took a few pictures. I will forever know what Mat Kearney on stage is like, and now when I hear his music, I will think about that night.

Last night we did another different thing. Because TJ has made videos for Mill Village Farms in recent years, we got invited to a volunteer appreciation dinner. Instead of my usual afternoon activity of preparing dinner and then us sitting down to our meal at home as a family at 6pm, we were pulling into a parking lot at the new Village Wrench building at that time last night. I had never been there and I didn’t know who else would be there. I wasn’t sure about the food except that it was going to be catered by Swamp Rabbit Café. I didn’t know there was an actual program before the meal started. This was all very different from what I do most nights at this time. But as we were standing there listening to the various thank you speeches, I got the chance to realize more of what Mill Village means to our community while at the same time realizing I was doing just fine in the not knowing. I didn’t know how long the program would last or what time we would finally eat dinner or what the actual food was or how the seating would go or if the kids were starving while they waited. I just stood there and listened and took it all in, and thought, this is good because this is different. I am learning that feeling different is more likely to give me good feelings than bad.

I also ate watermelon yesterday. That was different. I love watermelon but I never feel like there is the right time to eat it. Over the past couple years of intermittent fasting, I have boundaried my eating in such a way that it feels like freedom, but can also sometimes feel like I don’t open myself to different options. I wanted watermelon last night because the kids had been eating it earlier in the day and it looked so good. So I thought, why not now? Why not feel different after already feeling different? What a good fruit to eat and what a good way to feel.

I might look the same but I’m feeling different. Writing on the blog again feels different too!

Love, Ginger